What would you do if God actually gave you what you were asking for? Would you be ready for it? Could you handle it? What if He gave you the answer, the big picture, but then told you to wait for it all? It’s not time to receive it yet. Could you do it? Could you really wait?
I believe God knows us intimately. He knows how much He can reveal to us without our ego and selfishness getting in the way. It makes perfect sense that He often gives us one piece of the puzzle at a time. He might give me little glimpses or reveal things to me along the way, but I usually try to fill in all the missing parts to figure out the big picture on my own. Lately, I have really been wrestling with my flesh on this aspect of waiting on God and letting Him do what He wants when He wants. I just listen. Sounds easy enough, right?
The waiting period though. Ugh.
I hate waiting.
I’m not exactly a “sit still” kinda girl. I don’t like it at all. I get antsy and start thinking of a million things I could be doing that would be more productive. Waiting is definitely not my strong suit. I just want to keep things moving. Make things happen, ya know?
Over the last four years, the Lord has thrown a major wrench in my natural pace of life. He has shown me the abundance that can come from slowing down. He has reminded me that in my busyness I often run right past Him without noticing. He has kept Psalm 46:10 at the forefront of my mind because I simply need to hear it a lot.
“Be still and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations. I will be exalted in the earth!” Psalm 46:10
Wait.
That’s the one word I constantly get. It’s as if the Lord knows what I need or something. He knows what we need to work on the most. At 31 years old, I’m still learning how to be patient and trust Him enough to wait on His timing. I thought I had conquered that one a while ago, but alas, there are much deeper levels that await me.
As hard as it is to “wait”, I have found beauty in the silence and in the stillness like never before. I have learned how to listen to the spirit and pay attention to the signs when my soul is getting “cluttered” and busy. I get anxious. I get controlling. I get irritable. I get defensive. The list could go on and on. It takes a lot of effort on my part to actually make myself stop and slow down, but I am healthier and better for the world when I do it. My soul longs for the presence of God and I want to make more room and time in my life to be interrupted by Him.
Learning to wait on God is a necessary process to go through and every step matters. There are lessons along the way I will never learn if I keep getting ahead of Him in order to make things happen instead of waiting on Him to do the impossible. How will I ever notice God’s miracles in my life if I am at the front leading the charge to get my way? I want Him to get ALL the glory, but do I really trust Him enough to let Him?
Step back, slow down, let God lead. This is a mark of trust that I am still learning to walk in.
I hear His gentle reminder, “Do you trust me?”. This plays over and over in my spirit, not just once a day, but multiple times throughout the day. “Yes, God. You are trustworthy. Of course I trust you.” I say this with my mouth, but my actions and my attitude don’t always match up.
Wait.
Do nothing.
Do nothing?!?
This could be the WORST thing you could ask of me. I like to DO things. I like making stuff happen and being productive. I see a problem, I fix it. I see a need, I fill it. I like to get things going. I love feeling accomplished. “Doing NOTHING” is about as counter culture as you could get for me. I have to choose to really trust. I have to choose to do nothing. To let go of my dreams, my ideas, my way of doing things and take hold of HIS desires, HIS timing, and HIS ways.
“Wait on the Lord; Be of good courage and He shall strengthen your heart; Wait, I say, on the Lord.” Psalm 27:14
Wait.
Trust.
What does it look like to truly let go of things and really TRUST in God? To be content in letting Him drive your life and just sit in the passenger seat? I believe He is in control. I believe He is sovereign. I believe His promises are true. I take Him at His word. So, why is it so hard to let go? What would it look like to hold everything with open hands in order to gain something better? What if the dreams I have dreamed are not really the best fit for me? What if God never wanted those things for me, but has something in mind far beyond what I could ever dream up?
“Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all we ask or think, according to the power that works in us, to Him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever. Amen.” Ephesians 3:20-21
Above all we ask or think?! I want THAT!! But I have to be willing to let go of my feeble attempt to dream up something on my own. God is a dreamer! Even more than ME! I don’t want to confine Him to MY dreams. I want HIS!!
Every day is a battle. Every day I have the choice to pick up the reins and take control or keep walking in faith and trust my Father who loves me and seeks to give me really perfect gifts from Heaven. His way is so much better, but it’s definitely not easier.
What will you choose today? Will you go about your way? Or will you stop and listen and release your dreams into the hands of God? Making your own way might be easier, but only God’s way is truly fulfilling, freeing, and satisfying deep down in your soul. Give it ALL to Him. Trust and wait. There will be a return on your investment.
“But those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength; They shall mount up with wings like eagles, they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint.” Isaiah 40:31
